Teen Help for Young Adults: Dealing with an 18 Year old Child

Helping your teenager at any age is a priority.

Helping your teenager at any age is a priority.

At this time of year, it seems we are contacted by more and more parents that have an 18 year old or a 17 year old that is almost 18. If you have been struggling with your younger teen and like many of us, keep hoping and praying it will change, take a moment to think about if it doesn’t. Don’t miss opportunities to give your child a second chance for a bright future. Whether it is local therapy, a motivational program or a Boarding School, as parents we do what is best for our kids.

“My 18 year old is out of control and I am at my wit’s end! What can I do?” Anonymous Parent.

18 – 19 year old teens can be the most difficult to address simply because they are considered adults and cannot be forced to get help. As parents, we have limited to no control. Practicing “Tough Love” is easier said than done, many parents cannot let their child reach rock bottom. As parents, we see our child suffering whether it is needing groceries or a roof over their head and it is hard to shut the door on them.

I think this is one of the most important reasons that if you are a parent of a 16-17 year old that is out-of-control, struggling, defiant, using drugs and alcohol, or other negative behavior I believe it is time to look for intervention NOW. I am not saying it needs to be a residential treatment center or a program out of the home, but at least start with local resources such as therapists that specialize with adolescents and preferable offer support groups.

It is unfortunate that in most cases the local therapy is very limited how it can help your teen. The one hour once a week or even twice, is usually not enough to make permanent changes. Furthermore getting your defiant teen to attend sessions can sometimes cause more friction and frustrations than is already happening in the home.

This is the time to consider outside help such as a Therapeutic Boarding School or a Residential Treatment Center. However these parents with the 18-19 year old teenagers may have usually missed their opportunity. They were hoping and praying that at 16 or 17 things would change, but unfortunately, if not addressed, the negative behavior usually escalates.

In the past 12+ years I have heard from thousands of parents and most are hoping to get their child through high school and will be satisfied with a GED. It is truly a sad society of today’s teens when many believe they can simply drop out of school. Starting as early as 14 years old, many teens are thinking this way and we need to be sure they know the consequences of not getting an education.

Education in today’s world should be our children’s priority however with today’s peer pressure and entitlement issues, it seems to have drifted from education to defiance being happy just having fun and not being responsible.

I think there are many parents that debate whether they should take that desperate measure of sending a child to a program and having them escorted there but in the long run you need to look at these parents that have 18-19 year olds that don’t have that opportunity.

While you have this option, and it is a major decision that needs to be handled with the utmost reality of what will happen if things don’t change. The closer they are to 18 the more serious issues can become legally. If a 17+ year old gets in trouble with the law, in many states they will be tried as an adult.

This can be scary since most of these kids are good kids making very bad choices and don’t deserve to get caught up the system. As a parent I believe it is our responsible not to be selfish and be open to sending the outside of the home. It is important not to view this as a failure as a parent, but as a responsible parent that is willing to sacrifice your personal feelings to get your child the help they need.

At 18, it is unfortunate, these kids are considered adults – and as parents we basically lose control to get them the help they need. In most cases, if they know they have no other alternatives and this is the only option the parents will support, they will attend young adult programs that can offer them life skills, emotional growth, education and more to give them a second opportunity for a bright, successful future.

Do you need help finding young adult life skills programs?  Contact us at www.helpyourteens.com.

Parent’s Universal Resource Experts www.helpyourteens.com
Sue Scheff www.suescheff.com
Wit’s End Book  www.witsendbook.com

Teen Help: Hard Decision for Better Futures for your Teenagers

Yes, your teen is making bad choices.

Yes, your teen is failing.

Yes, your teen is experimenting with drugs.

Yes, your teen is hanging out with less than desirable kids.

Yes, your teen may be having sex.

Yes, your teen is disrespectful.

Yes, your teen needs help!  They don’t need to be harmed!

If you feel you are at your wit’s end and have exhausted all your local resources – therapy isn’t working or your teen simply refuses to go, it may be time to start thinking about residential therapy.

This doesn’t mean you are a bad parent, quite the contrary, you are giving your teen a second opportunity at a bright future.

Need more information? Visit www.HelpYourTeens.com.

Generational Curse and Addictions: What is it?

Addicts.  Addiction.  Intervention. Rehab.  Teen help.  Therapy.  Wit’s end.

We live in a world that has become more difficult than generations prior. The stress levels, the economy, job loss, losing homes, and even losing loved ones to suicide – bullying – or addiction; when does it end?

Guest writer, Christine Kane, gives us some great insights to consider about the generational curse:

What is a generational curse? Well, what is a curse? First of all, we’re not talking about some voodoo, spirituality thing. Curses are real. They are bad habits and wrong thinking. No one curses you; you curse yourself. Or, in the case of generational curses, your family curses you. But curses are not indestructible. They are not eternal or unavoidable. There are ways to break a generational curse.

Let’s talk examples. What are some generational curses that are common? Alcoholism, child abuse, drug addition, spouse abuse, inappropriate sexual urges, laziness, selfishness, divorce. There are many, many more. If your family has no history of this, if you are the only one with these problems, then you are not under a generational curse. However, if your family has a background in these, you are under a generational curse. What do I mean by that?

A generational curse is part nature and part nurture. Your DNA comes from your parents. They decide your color, your race, your hair, your height, and your health. They also affect your disposition and behaviors. How you are raised marks you just as much as whom you were born from. Not only are you born with certain tendencies, you are raised to accept or reject them.

But you’re an adult now. How you were raised doesn’t affect who you are now, right? Wrong. If you don’t comprehend that who you are now is linked to who your family is, you will never be able to break free of the curse. A generational curse is powerful because it is pervasive. If your parents did it, if your aunts and uncles and cousins did it, then it is no longer abnormal or appalling when you do it. It is just a normal part of life. That is how curses work. They trick you into believing they are ordinary, typical, or inevitable. But they are not.

So, how can you break a generational curse? First admit your own participation. Claim your own rebellion, repent of your own contribution. But you don’t want to do that. You want to claim that you’re just like your mother, so it’s not really your fault. Well, okay then, your kids are going to end up just like her, too. You are an adult now. Claim your own involvement in the curse so that you can overcome it. You can’t overcome what you won’t face.

Second, confess your family’s involvement. You will get nowhere by covering up the past. You must dig up the who and why and how and bring it to light. Even if the contributors are long dead and gone, the curse must be brought to the light so that it can be wiped away. It might be from your grandfather or great-grandfather, but it must be exposed and confessed. Only once the source is exposed will the curse be broken. The issue is not whether they are alive, but is their curse alive?

Generational curses can be huge. They can affect entire groups and races of people. They have affects in slavery and prejudice and family structure and it goes so, so deep. Entire countries can be based on generational curses and the problems that accompany them. So never think you are alone in this. This is not easy. You are breaking a chain; a chain that can have many, many links.

Author Bio

This Guest post is by Christine Kane from internet service providers, she is a graduate of Communication and Journalism. She enjoys writing about a wide-variety of subjects for different blogs.  She can be reached via email at: Christi.Kane00@ gmail.com.

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Teen Drug Use: Do you know who is giving your teen drugs?

‘I got my hair from my mom.’

‘I got my eyes from my dad.’

‘And my drugs from my grandma’s medicine cabinet.’

More than 3.1 million teens ages 12 to 17 report abusing prescription drugs. Click here for guidelines for prescription drug abuse prevention and discuss them with your family and friends.

The target audience for Lock Your Meds™ is 20-80-year-old adults, with the primary focus on keeping prescription and over-the-counter pharmaceuticals away from drug abusers.  Many adults may be unwitting suppliers and by making adults aware of the problem we can curb the abuse by others.

YOU HOLD THE KEY TO YOUR CHILD’S DRUG-FREE FUTURE

Review the following guidelines for prescription drug abuse prevention and discuss them with family & friends.

LOCK YOUR MEDS
Prevent your children from abusing your own medication by securing your meds in places your child cannot access.

TAKE INVENTORY
Download your Home Medicine Inventory Card, write down the name and amount of medications you currently have and regularly check to see that nothing is missing.

EDUCATE YOURSELF & YOUR CHILD
Learn about the most commonly abused types of prescription medications (pain relievers, sedatives, stimulants and tranquilizers). Then, communicate the dangers to your child regularly; once is not enough.

SET CLEAR RULES & MONITOR BEHAVIOR
Express your disapproval of using prescription drugs without a prescription. Monitor your child’s behavior to ensure that the rules are being followed.

PASS IT ON
Share your knowledge, experience and support with the parents of your child’s friends. Together, you can create a tipping point for change and raise safe, healthy and drug-free children.

Source: Informed Families of South Florida

Be an educated parent, you will have safer teens.

Do you have a teen that you suspect is using drugs? Have you exhausted all your local resources? Take the time to learn about residential therapy, visit www.HelpYourTeens.com. Each teen and family are unique, there are many teen help programs, knowing how to locate the one best for you can be a challenge, however Parents’ Universal Resource Experts in Broward County, can help, starting with a free consultation.

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Teen Text Talk: Do You Know What Your Teen is Saying?

What did they mean?

Whether it is texting, instant messaging, or social networking – do you really know what your teenager is saying?  They seem to have their own language and codes for things parents may not approve of.

One of my favorite new sites is Enough is Enough! And how many times as parents do we say this?

Do you feel overwhelmed about protecting children from the dangers of the virtual world?

Who doesn’t?

When it comes to teens it can be more difficult and even more important to be a parent in the know.

Let’s start with 50 Acronyms Parents Should Know:

(Courtesy of Enough is Enough and NetLingo)

  1. 8 – Oral sex
  2. 1337 – Elite -or- leet -or- L337
  3. 143 – I love you
  4. 182 – I hate you
  5. 1174 – Nude club
  6. 420 – Marijuana
  7. 459 – I love you
  8. ADR – Address
  9. AEAP – As Early As Possible
  10. ALAP – As Late As Possible
  11. ASL – Age/Sex/Location
  12. CD9 – Code 9 – it means parents are around
  13. C-P – Sleepy
  14. F2F – Face-to-Face
  15. GNOC – Get Naked On Cam
  16. GYPO – Get Your Pants Off
  17. HAK – Hugs And Kisses
  18. ILU – I Love You
  19. IWSN – I Want Sex Now
  20. J/O – Jerking Off
  21. KOTL – Kiss On The Lips
  22. KFY -or- K4Y – Kiss For You
  23. KPC – Keeping Parents Clueless
  24. LMIRL – Let’s Meet In Real Life
  25. MOOS – Member Of The Opposite Sex
  26. MOSS – Member(s) Of The Same Sex
  27. MorF – Male or Female
  28. MOS – Mom Over Shoulder
  29. MPFB – My Personal F*** Buddy
  30. NALOPKT – Not A Lot Of People Know That
  31. NIFOC – Nude In Front Of The computer
  32. NMU – Not Much, You?
  33. P911 – Parent Alert
  34. PAL – Parents Are Listening
  35. PAW – Parents Are Watching
  36. PIR – Parent In Room
  37. POS – Parent Over Shoulder -or- Piece Of Sh**
  38. pron – porn
  39. Q2C – Quick To Cum
  40. RU/18 – Are You Over 18?
  41. RUMORF – Are You Male OR Female?
  42. RUH – Are You Horny?
  43. S2R – Send To Receive
  44. SorG – Straight or Gay
  45. TDTM – Talk Dirty To Me
  46. WTF – What The F***
  47. WUF – Where You From
  48. WYCM – Will You Call Me?
  49. WYRN – What’s Your Real Name?
  50. zerg – To gang up on someone

Be an educated parent – you will have safer teens!

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Teen Drug Use and Target America: Know the Damage Drug Use Causes

It’s not my kid.

He’s only smoking pot.

It’s the friends she is hanging with.

The longer parents are in denial, the more they are at risk of raising an addict.

Addiction is treatable, education is key to prevention.  Let’s not get to the addiction phase.

Most Americans are unaware of the science behind the damaging effects of illegal drugs on the mind and body, or of the other tremendous costs associated with the production, sale, and use of illegal drugs. The costs to society—estimated at more than $180 billion a year—are borne by all of us in some way.

Target America: Opening Eyes to the Damage Drugs Cause is a traveling exhibit designed to open eyes to the science behind addiction to illegal drugs and the myriad costs of illegal drugs—to individuals, American society, and the world—and to provide food for thought on how each and every one of us can make a difference.

The exhibit, which debuted at the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) Museum in 2002, presents newly expanded content, including SAMHSA’s interactive learning experience that enables visitors to explore the facts related to underage drinking, illicit drug use, and prescription drug misuse and abuse, and to learn how they can help individuals who are at risk for or contemplating suicide. Redesigned for this most recent opening, SAMHSA’s section supports its Strategic Initiative to prevent mental illness and substance abuse by focusing on actions and activities that help people build emotional health and stay free of drugs and alcohol.

Learn more by visiting Target America and download their brochure here.

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Home to Homeroom: Learn About Teen Drug Use Prevention

Parenting teens is a challenge today.

Schools and parents today need to work together to help prevent teen drug use.

Fast Facts: Preventing Teen OTC Cough Medicine Abuse – From Home to Homeroom

A Wake Up Call for Parents

  • Thirty-three percent of American high school teens know someone who has abused cough medicine, a wake up call for those parents who think that their teen is not affected or being exposed to the issue.
  • Six percent of high school teens admit to abusing cough medicine containing dextromethorphan, or DXM, to get high in the past year.

Cough Medicine Abuse Does Not Happen By Accident

  • While safe and effective when taken as directed, teens looking to get high from cough medicine take excessive amounts, sometimes 25 to 50 times the recommended dosage. This translates to multiple bottles or packages of medicine at one time.
  • Teens often abuse cough medicines with other prescription drugs, illicit drugs, or alcohol.
  • Even the best kid in the world doesn’t have the same ability as adults to assess risk because the part of their brain that processes risk, the frontal cortex, doesn’t finish developing until their mid 20s.

Parents Have the Power to Keep Teens Drug-free

  • Research shows that kids who learn a lot from their parents about the risk of drug abuse are up to half as likely to use.
  • Parents are not alone in their fight to prevent medicine abuse; reaching out to the school nurse can help parents learn more about the issue and access local resources.
  • Parents can learn more about the Home to Homeroom campaign by logging onto www.StopMedicineAbuse.org

Parents can interact and help raise awareness by joining online communities including:

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